Getting lighter

I always said I wouldn't take my weight loss seriously till I lost at least 10 lbs- so far I can claim 10.5 lbs.  I can officially acknowledge the hard work.  I think running has been the biggest help with loosing weight- and nursing L.

So in celebration I registered for my first 5K race- July 17th.  Not because I'm such a hot shot runner that I would place- heck I will probably come in close to last.  I'm doing it more for a way to motivate myself and keep things challenging- running on the treadmill gets boring and outside runs are few and far between- also I can cross it off my list of 28 things for my 28th year.

(image via pinterest)

Still at it...

Running that is.  My timing is really sad- like my best 5K time so far is 36:12.  Thats pretty slow, but for me its huge- I never thought I would be able to run for 30 min straight.  Right now I am doing the bridge to 10K, which allows me to build on the 5K and pushes me to a 10K.  I have done all my runs on the treadmill, but tomorrow I plan to try for a morning run outside- I'm staying in south bay so babka can watch L.  A little intimidated about it...

BTW the above pic is of the first woman ever to officially register and run in the Boston Marathon, in 1967.  Found here.  She was harassed by the men who didn't want her to run- what the heck were they so fearful of?

Hindsight

I wish I had known how much I would love being a mom and want to devote my full self to doing this.  I would have made very different choices about school, career, and money management.  Yes, this a post where I whine that I do not stay home with my amazing son.  Although I love aspects of my job, have moments where I feel good about the work I do, adore many of my coworkers- the passion and drive to be there is gone.  I find myself angry, inconvenienced, and just resentful at work and at home while I do those wonderful things working moms do (washing a billion bottles/pump parts, packing diapers, lugging back and forth the daycare necessities...and the commuting).  I'm burnt out- all my reserves are being used to go do my job, there's not enough left to be the mom I want to be.

I imagine I would get some feedback about focusing on the positives, or creating better self care- self care is a joke when you're a mom, at least compared to the freedom that existed before.  I do everything in my power to get good sleep (short of sending my son away- of course not an option), I exercise (how I have kept this Couch to 5K thing up and am in week 4 is beyond me)....

Last night when I came home I forgot to put the bottles of milk I pumped at work in the fridge- I remembered in the morning.  This is one incident in a long line of incidents that show I am not keeping up with everything on my plate.  So I sit here pumping on a Saturday hoping to make enough milk for Monday- the freezer stash wont last forever.

Something's gotta give...

Running

I almost don't want to post/proclaim this...

I've started running on our treadmill (purchased from craigslist).  It's a lot cheaper then our gym membership was and I can still be with L or just go for a short run while he is napping- if he ever lets me put him down for a nap again!  I'm not a "good" runner, never have been, my poor lungs just don't want to keep up.  But there's nothing like running that gets me out of my head, and works so many different muscles.  So here I am starting the couch to 5K program...